Dealing with the Here and Now!

Happy Thanksgiving! My two daughters are supposed to be here for Thanksgiving. I was so looking forward to it. Time together, no expectations other than time spent together. My oldest daughter got in on time and though I have had to work she has caught up on sleep and getting better since she is run down. My other daughter was supposed to come down this morning but missed her flight. So instead of a whole day spent together eating and hanging with friends, she won't be getting in until 10 tonight. A whole day lost of not spending time together. She was distraught, I am sad and it is what it is! My daughters missed a day of being together, we all did.
Life is like that more often than not. It is amazing how many things don't work out. I can count so many times where the thing desired for most of the time just did not happen. The longer I live the more I understand that most of life comes out of disappointment not of dreams fulfilled. So what do I do with this? I have noticed it takes a lot of hope and energy to desire after so many disappointments. Lately, after some pretty horrific disappointments I am having the hardest time desiring and having hope. "Hope deferred makes the heart grow faint" the good book says. How true! How very true! Now with the holidays here, there are things we all hope for, family and friends to get along, or even better, get along great! Gifts to get and receive that we truly hope will at least give some satisfaction! In other words GREAT MEMORIES MADE!
I love Romans 15:13, I come back to it time and time again in moments like these when my hope is low and my desire is hard to find.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

There is so much to glean from in this verse, and all of it requires my trust and dependence on God. He provides joy, peace and hope and it comes in overflow, not just enough but more than enough. I find that when my trust and dependence on Him is low so is my joy, peace and hope. In this season may you and I find that no matter what our desires and hopes that we find them through God and not through anything else.

Embracing Trials

Psalm 71:20-21


"Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again."

True confession here - most all of my life I just was never sure I had what it took to make it, I mean really make it in life. I grew up with this message that I just was not good enough and that life is measured by success and achievement. Sound familar? At times I would experience moments when what I offered to others was very very good and oh to hang onto those moments. But they were fleeting and for whatever reason I did not absorb them deeply into my heart, instead I would rush into the next thing trying to prove my worth.
I understand now that the only way to know I have what it takes is to be tested, to face trial after trial. And really, it's not just a issue of achieving to prove worth, my true worth rests in who God is, what He has done for me and who I am in Him. Read through a couple of my favorite quotes;
"Hope knows that if great trials are avoided, great deeds remain undone and the possibility of growth into greatness of soul is aborted. Pessimism and defeatism are never the fruit of the life-giving Spirit, but rather reveal our unawareness of present risenness." Brennan Manning from Abba's Child

"A warrior must develop an un-yielding heart. This is where he will be most profoundly tested. Above all a warrior learns to yield his heart to nothing. Not to kill his heart for fear of falling into temptation, but to protect his heart as a great resovior of passionate strength and holy desire." John Elderedge

I will write more, but I know as a Valiant Warrior I was meant to fight in battle, have adventure in my life to keep my soul alive and alert and to have a beauty to rescue. Trials are my friend!

DFP - Defensive Fighting Position

A Foxhole! Perhaps an odd subject to write about when it comes to all things spiritual transformation but not really. BTW, the picture I posted I found out is from July of 1958, I was a month old! Okay moving on, we are not meant to wage war alone. Far too many people live their inner lives isolated, private and alone. WHY? Are they afraid that if people really knew them they would freak out and leave? If that were the case then nearly everyone would be alone. Life is a both a process, but it is also a hostile battle. Scripture clearly points this out. I think many people are un-aware, they just believe their lives are full of hassles mixed with joys. Ever since Eve and Adam were tempted the battle ensued. Spiritual warfare will be another upcoming subject I am passionate about. But back to the Foxhole.
A foxhole was set up so that there was a 360 degree fighting position where those in the foxhole could protect each others' back. Whose got yours? I am serious! When you are hit with battle who has your back? Who is in your life that you know and are known enough to trust each other to be there during life's most difficult times? I want a sharpshooter who knows how to defend and take out the incoming attackers. I don't want just a nice person I am friends with. I want a warrior, someone who is not afraid of war, who not only is willing to be on the front-lines but knows it's necessary. Someone who wears and uses the entire armor with great skill and a warrior's mind and heart.
Here's my question to you. Who is your foxhole person/people? YOU MUST HAVE SOME! Who would say they want you in their foxhole? This needs to be addressed immediately, if no names pop up you need to fix this right away! I have several and I am grateful, and for all you Kevin Conklin Foxhole people out there reading this...thanks for asking me to watch your back/heart and for doing the same for me! We are in this together!!!!

Take Heart

In John 16 Jesus is giving the news to His followers that His time with them is coming to a close. They don't understand it, Jesus makes it clear and then gives them some promises about life after the one they know. Then He says them in verse 33;

"I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the (troubles of this) world. italics mine!

Yesterday I got the news that due to budget constrains myself and 22 other people were going to be layed off at the church I serve at. In this world you will have trouble! I sat there in shock and disbelief, but only for a moment. I am in touch with my emotions to be sure, but the reality of God's promises to me and His faithfulness brought me almost immediately out of my shock. I was facing trouble, but Jesus has overcome everything! That's the truth.
In James 1 it says "Consider pure joy when (Not if) you face various trials BECAUSE you know (are convinced) that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish it's work so that you may be mature/whole, complete, not lacking anything."
This has to be one of my favorite scriptures because it explains the point of hard times, and even better it reminds me to embrace trials because my true desire is to be whole/mature and complete not lacking in anything. James says that the only way to get there is through various trials. NO SHORTCUTS!
Just a couple minutes ago I read my oldest daughters blog (thanks sweet Britt), she has faced many a trial in her almost 21 years. She is a deep feeler and that means she has mercy gifts like few I know. As her Dad, all I wanted to do was drive up to N.E. Georgia at her college and hug on her, love on her and be there with her. I can't, but God is and does! she knows that deep in her heart and I pray she is convinced of that right now in this moment and the ones to come! I write all of this to remind us that hard times and suffering will come, they are promised not out of some sadistic manefesto by God but as an opportunity for us to become whole and complete not lacking in anything. I close with this incredible verse from Proverbs 4:23 "Above everything else, guard your heart, it is the well-spring of life." We are assualted all of the time, the enemies of satan, the world and our own flesh attack us, so we must protect the most important thing, our heart, our good and valuable heart! Jesus said that the thief comes to "rob, kill and destroy, but I have come that you may have life to the full/abundant/overflow." In the midst of our sufferings and trials remember that Jesus has overcome and that we can be joyful in the midst of them because of what it will produce in our lives.

A Big taste of Humble Pie!

Today at my Optical job I got jolted. I think God wanted to show me that I need to have a much more merciful and compassionate heart. Sometimes I need to get a refresher course in humility. The very first patient was actually a homeless man. His odor evident within 25 feet. I found out later he hadn't showered in 3 weeks. He had just been released from jail after having been shot in a fight. He walked in without shoes, carrying them instead in his hands with another change of clothes, and clearly had been in a bad place in his life. I won't speak for anyone else at our store but it was repulsive. I was concerned that other patients once they came in would walk out. The guy had insurance so he was eligible to receive glasses. I asked him to put his shoes on, he went to the Dr.'s office to fill out paper work and the Dr.'s tech ran him through a series of pre-exam tests. Once he came from his exam and I saw that he had an RX, I went to him to wait on him. I had him sit down and saw that he had no co-pay so a free pair was coming his way. His skin was worn, chaffing and his smell only worse the closer I got to him. He had a terrible wheezing cough and to safeguard myself from potential sickness I asked him about it. He told me he had emphysema and some other type of cancer. In other words, he wasn't just sick, the man was dying. I found him a frame, filled his RX, gave him his receipts and since he had no phone in which to contact him, I told him to come back in a week.
I cleaned all the instruments I had to use to fill his Rx and washed my hands completely. Then I wept inside and asked God to wash my own heart clean. Jesus died for him as much as He did me! Later today, a proudly homosexual teen came in to order glasses. I don't know what his situation, but Jesus loves him as He does me and my homeless patient, and as much as the College Professor I waited on and as much as the elderly couple. I needed to swallow a big helping of humble pie today. I choked down my pride and self-righteousness, I am no better than any of these and as the Apostle Paul said of himself "the chief of all sinners". I just know this. No matter my financial situation, my educational achievements, the people I know, the places I've lived and traveled, the car I drive or the talents I possess, I need God's love and grace every second of every minute of every day! Thanks God for the humble pie, may I be different for this helping!

Less Information More Transformation

In studying the great revolutions of our country one such revolution was the industrial revolution where we went from manual everything to mechanization, it changed so much of how we do what we do and allowed for mass production. We now live in the information revolution and it amazes me what we have access to in just seconds. Okay, I am not old but even in my adult lifespan so much has changed how I do life and my job. For instance in high school there were typing classes where we typed on real typewriters. In college we actually had to use the dewey decimal system because you had to go to a library and grab a stack of books to research and pull out quotes and read the book in order to write a paper or make a speech. Then the green screen computers came out and we used MS Dos and we had those templates that went over our keyboards so we could know all the things our computers could do if we pushed certain keys with other keys. Amazing! Now, with wikipedia and google life is so much faster and easier. But....when it comes to spiritual things reading and information do not altogether mean change and transformation. Knowledge and understanding do not automatically produce morphing.
I am even more passionate that true transformation comes one person at a time, over time and that through test and trial we learn all about the kind of character, strength and perserverance we have. There are no shortcuts to transformation. In this Information Revolution seekers and believers alike still want the answer to this question "does it work?"

How to Clean Out Your Fridge

At my office is a Staff Refrigerator. That fridge has been on the fritz for awhile and facilities sent out an e-mail basically asking all staff to clean out any food we brought. No one did! For a week or so that fridge was unplugged. So as I was picking up some copies in the workroom today I noticed a foul odor, upon further investigation I came to the conclusion it was the fridge. I opened it (what was I thinking?) and out came one of the worst smells you can imagine. Things were growing in there if that gives you a word picture. So, Robyn from facilities and I strapped on some latex gloves and cleaned that baby out. Problem solved! But not easy on the eyes, nose and the office.
Now let me move onto our lives in the same vein. Often times if we leave things alone that we know are not good, rotten is more like it, it will not be hidden for long. It will be noticeable!! Why on earth do we allow ourselves to be convinced that we might get away with hiding the yuck of our lives from others, even God?
Believers do not for the most part do a great job of "speaking the truth to one another in love" nor do we do a great job of "confessing our sins to one another so we might be healed." Nor do we practice much of what we are commanded by going to someone in sin and confronting them over for the sole purpose of restoring them back into right relationship with God. How long do we think we can hide the rotten smell of our lives in secret? Perhaps at one time or another instead of grace being applied liberally we experienced judgement. So we might not know how to apply it to others or we are fearful of being considered self-righteous and judgemental. Or we just live much too isolated from others to earn the right to know and be known. Scripture is clear that we must be iron sharpeners. We must live close enough to each other to know and be known, to care/love enough to confront, for the long term consequences are not good. We will end up being a stench to ourselves and others.
So lets choose to live out what David said in Psalm 139, "search me O God and know my heart, try me and see if there is any wickedness in me and lead me to the righteous and everlasting way." Today, do a self inspection, clean out your "fridge/soul" before the inner contents get out and everyone knows, or worse, God and you end up far apart/hypocritical and hardended in your heart. I think I will clean out my fridge on a regular basis, excuse me I need to go to the kitchen right now!!!!

Contenment

Life is FULL of challenges! They are not our enemies but our friends! They bring about character and perseverance! At the same time we have our desires. Assuming our desires are Godly and aligned with His will, God wants us to ask for our hearts desire. We have the story of the persistent widow who wore out a Judge to get her way. I often wonder if God wants us to "wear Him out" to test us to see if we are serious about our desires. But...these desires must not become an obesession/idol. Paul said that he had found contentment in every circumstance. I have some things to learn in this regard.

I got some news today that crushed a huge desire of my heart. I prayed and lived out all the things I could that I truly thought right about this. I am not sure I have prayed harder for something. And I must admit, I had let the desire take over my thoughts this past week. Not Good! I had a strong sense about the situation taking a turn I didn't want, and fought hard in the battlefield of my mind. My sense of intuition/spirit prompting is pretty accurate and what I sensed turned out to be true. I deeply want to be content in all situations. I must be a slow learner when it comes to this so God is granting me another test to conquer! I so need the workings of the Blessed Counselor on this one and to saturate my mind with His word and make sure I am alert and aware of the enemies (my flesh, the world and the devil). How are you at contentment? I could use some advice!

What Makes your Heart Come Alive

I love amusement rides. What I don't love is standing in those long lines just to get on the ride. The ride is what I am waiting for, wanting to experience, but which takes longer? (the long boring line) What is over so quickly? (the exhilirating ride) While I wait in these long lines, my heart is aching to hurry up and get on that ride and experience life to the max. Most of us are willing to wait ridiculously long amounts of time for a few brief moments of "LIFE". Jesus was talking about the kind of life He desired us to experience and why He came, but it came as a good news/bad news announcement. John 10:10 "The thief comes to rob, kill and destroy..." get us in the long lifeless line we call life. He robs us of what God truly wants us to experience, he kills our desires and hopes and he destroys within us the longings we have to make a difference, to make our life count. So maybe we experience life every once in awhile like God intended, but like that ride it's brief and then we hop back in another lifeless line where we spend the bulk of our lives. We were called to be aliens, not to imitate the others, this is not our home, this place robs us and kills us and destroys us. We become like cattle/sheep following the one ahead of us doing what everyone else, in a line that is going to eventually slaughter us.
But Jesus went on to say at the end of the verse "but I have come that you might experience the life I intended for you to live, one that overflows (not just trickles). There is a constant (sometimes second by second) battle going on between the life God intended and the one we settle for. God says we must "be alert, always standing firm for the devil prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour." Alert! What, we must be alert? Absolutely! But do you feel alert most of your life? Or more like you do when standing in those hideously long lines? Now since God truly loves us and wants the best for us, I don't think it included the long lifeless life. But the overflowing, live life to the full kind. Can it be done?
That's next!