The In-Between

Going home, you can do it but it's never the same! I went home recently for my youngest daughter's college graduation (Way to go Elyse), and I was also able to go visit my siblings who live in the small town we grew up in. When I am there I love to go for long runs along familiar streets, and one of the places I run by is our town's cemetery. It reminds me of my mortality, I was born here and I have lived in many cities and states since then but I love coming home. We all have a birthdate and celebrate it, but we also have a death date, that date we have no clue about, but rest assured it's coming. Not trying to sound doomsday or morbid, it's just a reality.

What happens in-between our birthdate and death date is EVERYTHING! We have no idea when our death date will be, for all I know this could be my last blog. But what we do with that in-between time is called our life? I know when I put my head on the pillow at night I take for granted that I will wake up the next day and get to live it passionately for God. I am so incredibly glad to know the following;

* I know that God loves me, chose me and I responded to that invitation.
* I know I am not good enough to earn my way to Heaven, but because Christ Jesus went in my place I am able to spend eternity with God worshipping Him, enjoying whatever He has for me here and there and that hope is secure.
* I know that He has given me purpose and gifts/abilities to accomplish that purpose and so my life has meaning!
* I know that my life is not my own, it was bought with a price I could never repay, but it is in fact a free gift available to anyone just for the asking.
* I know that my life would be a complete wreck without God, sure I could live and have a job and get up and do it all over everyday, but frankly that is never enough for me or most people. We are always asking "Is that all there is?". "What is the meaning of life?" "Why am I here?"

So, we have a birthdate, and the reality is we have a death date, it's just not known to us yet. The question I challenge you with right here and right now to ask is...

WHAT WILL I DO WITH THE IN-BETWEEN?

Bold and Passionate Prayers

A lot has happened since my last post, but I want to write about what I read in scripture this morning. Over in I Kings, Solomon had just finished building the Temple and was dedicating it, and in Chapter 8 in the Message version it says that he had finished praying bold and passionate prayers, he had been kneeling the whole time and had his arms raised before God. I am someone who loves prayer, I love praying, listening in prayer, praying with others and participating in Concerts of Prayer. I am a praying kind of person, not boastful here to make myself seem ever so spiritual, but I am communicating that I LOVE PRAYER!

I am often curious why some Christians, in fact a majority have such a hard time praying out loud in public whether it be a small or large group. Why? Do they just not practice prayer in private, or have they not had good modeling? Do we just not teach on it enough? Is it just an odd practice speaking to someone we can't see or hear from? Is this why Prayer meetings are so poorly attended in most churches? And when believers talk about wanting revival, do they not know that before every great revival in history it was always proceeded by a movement of prayer? I want revival, we NEED it badly as we watch the world coming apart at the seams all the more reason to turn toward God. I would have loved to hear Solomon's BOLD and PASSIONATE Prayers, I want to have bold and passionate prayers, who is with me? Let's get out of the shadows of shame and ignorance and self consciousness about our prayer lives and lets learn together how to pray boldly and passionately. Let's make our prayer lives a strength rather than something we hope others just won't find out about. Speaking to God, pouring out to Him and even hearing from God ought to be the most natural thing we do, like breathing.

Delighting in God

For 2011 I have chosen to meditate and wrap my life around 2 verses from scripture. The first is Romans 15;13 "I pray that God, the source of hope will fill you completely with joy and peace BECAUSE you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit." (more on that verse in another blog) but the other verse is;
Psalm 37:4-5. "Take delight in the Lord and He will give you your hearts desires. Commit everything you do to the Lord, trust in Him and HE will do it."

One of the last things I am about is one of those wealth and prosperity Christians, there is absolutely no logic or correct line of thinking here. Try preaching it in India or Haiti or any 3rd world country. Honestly the poor do not have the lure and distractions of money, they just need to survive everyday, but they have a joy from God that no amount of money could ever give. Enough of that....here is what I am learning and applying each day this year regarding Psalm 37:4-5. First, delighting in God without asking Him anything for myself is not as easy as you might think, well not for me anyway. I find in my prayer life that so much of it was in asking God for answers for myself and others. Yes, I am commanded to bring my requests before God with faith and with His will in mind. I am also commanded to pray without ceasing as well as many other commands, but delighting in Him has been so good for my soul!!! The fact that He knows what my heart desires are all ready makes it redundant to ask what He knows anyway, my part is to delight in Him, totally commit my life to Him and His part is to grant me the desires of my heart that are in line with His perfect will! How cool!!! So this is how a new prayer for me might sound like;

"Father, I delight in my future, that You hold the keys, that You are the author and perfecter of my faith and I delight that no good thing do you withhold from those who truly love you. I delight that you are the giver of all good things, I delight that your protection for me is secure as You go before me, come behind me and send Your angels to camp over me! I delight that you actually care so intimately about me that when one more of my hairs falls out (and more have fallen out then grown back in) you know it! Thank you God for knowing my every step and day and nothing takes you by surprise. In Jesus matchless name, Amen!"

How I might have prayed this prayer could have sounded like this; "Father God, I need your help desperately, I need a better paying job. I need to provide better for those I love, and I feel so in-adequate in not doing so. Please God, please, I ask that you jump in and help me quickly, I am in dire straits here and you know it. Thank you and bless you God, in Jesus matchless name - Amen!

Do you see the difference? I am a Dad and I am so glad when my adult children communicate something to me about me that they love about me. I disliked it when the only thing I was good for was when they just asked for things only I could provide, I did love providing it, but not wanting it to define my parental existence. So it is true of my relationship with my Heavenly Father, He has the resources to provide everything I need, and He could give me everything I want, (that would not be good of course). But the best thing I can do is delight in Him.

How do we delight in God? Well, that's for the next blog! I'd love to hear your thoughts on how you delight in God on a regular basis!

Is Christmas just for Kids?

I admit it I am a kid at heart! Growing up in a large family in a small rural Mid-Western town, I have stored some really good memories, and of course they are somewhat romanticized. Magical snow-falls on cold nights, sledding on a hill that at the time seemed a lot longer and steeper than it is today, drinking hot chocolate with large melted marsh-mellows that left a mustache on my upper lip but did warm up my chilled to the bones body! I remember Christmas Eve services at my church where we held candles while singing "Silent Night" at midnight and then heard the church bells ring as the service ended. Now that was pretty cool. I remember all 5 of us kids "sleeping" in the same room on Christmas Eve and waiting the next morning for our parents to drink their coffee before we could come downstairs, open our stockings first and then taking turns (youngest to oldest and one at a time) opening our presents and saying thank you after each one.
Good memories as a kid for sure, and later as a Dad myself I did my best to create memories for my girls. Whether it was decorating the house, letting them pick out the real tree, and decorating it with the sounds of really old Christmas music playing in the background. We would read my collection of Christmas stories while drinking hot chocolate and picking out a local family to share the 12 Days of Christmas with as we anonymously put a package on the front steps, rang the door bell and ran before they could see us and never knew who did it!
But my girls are grown up now, and just a couple weeks ago I helped my oldest and her husband decorate their very first tree and listen to the same corny Christmas music that she has to play! It can be depressing not having little ones around, but I truly want to focus on the gift of God and everything that goes with it. I don't want to get caught up on racking my brain out trying to come up with that just right gift for the special people in my life in hopes that they will really, really love it or hope that those who choose to give me a gift will give me just the right one so that my fragile ego will be stroked just enough to feel good!
No, instead I want to experience the knowledge from head to heart that God truly loved me enough to send His perfect Son to take my place and pay in full the penalty for my waywardness that my efforts and good deeds could never do. I am amazed that God would replace my filthy rags of niceness and good works that will always fall short with a royal robe of His righteousness that Christ Himself will put on me. I can barely take in that He chose to adopt me, give me an inheritance that has a value that cannot be measured and that God would not just choose me but use me, that He would give me a new identity, a new name and allow me to come boldly before Him with confidence all because of what Jesus did by being obedient instead of keeping His rightful, comfortable throne in Heaven and leave it for a humble, smelly stable. That He would choose to be spat on, wrongly accused, mocked, beaten beyond recognition and then endure for awhile the cross and be separated from His Father all so that we could be set free from sin and be forgiven.
He has changed the world, the fact that the world stops and celebrates Him is amazing, but that we worship temporal gifts instead of the true gift and the great gift giver must sadden Him immensely. May Christmas 2010 become the year when we all bend down on our knees and take the time to worship and adore what this season and holiday are all about! Oh Come Let Us Adore Him, Christ the Lord!

A Paradigm Shift in True Christianity!

Question - Why are most Christians here in the United States not radically different than the many believers in other countries who are literally being imprisoned, tortured or dying because they are willing to stand up and stand out for their faith? Answer - because churches here are spending so little time helping new believers truly "get it". They are often in too big of a hurry making sure the new believer fits into their culture than helping them really fall deeply in love with God. Most mature believers have become saturated with the world and fitting into a bland form of religion. The church in the U.S. has for the longest time been far more interested in how many members or attenders they have, how many programs they provide, who has the nicest facilities, children's programs, student ministries and worship experience instead of walking a new believer by the hand to the point where transformation is taking place and knowing and living out scripture is an obvious part of their DNA. Is what churches are teaching/modeling about following God really making a difference? I don't think so, look around you and see the results of what I call the "Have to" principle and has almost always trumped the "Want to" principle. What I mean by this is we spend so little time helping new followers fall so deeply in love with God that they want to spend time with Him, reading His words, memorizing and meditating on it. Worship is alive and authentic, giving time, money and gifts are want to and not have to, and true community is something those where those on the outside looking in desperately want for themselves. Instead we communicate verbally and non-verbally that going to church services, being in a Life Group, serving and giving are the deal. THEY ARE NOT THE DEAL, but they can be a result of the true deal!

It took Jesus 3 years with 12 guys and honestly they did not get it until Jesus left and sent the Holy Spirit for them to be different. If 3 years of daily time with Jesus wasn't quite enough back then, how can we presume to think a 4 week Sermon Series on transformation, and then herding them into a Life/Small Group will do the trick?

Spending time helping believers get it requires first and foremost helping them have "right thinking" about God and authentic Biblical thinking. Often times this means "un-doing" a lot of false truth, misconceptions and have to's. This process cannot be hurried!!! How can it be? If George Gallup and George Barna are correct regarding how many people here in the States claim to be Born Again Christians and not just Protestant's than why hasn't this world and country become something other that what it is...A MESS? I declare that we must take time to help new followers get how much God loves them, all that He has done for them and all that they are in Him. If they get this, the overflow of the hearts and their minds will become transformational in how they live. Look at Acts chapter 2 and what you will find is a radically different church than what we see in 99% of churches today. People cannot be transformed through a single service or program, how many followers have been taught the great commission found in Matthew 28? I know many can recite this verse, but seriously when we are commanded to "teach everything that Jesus was and did" how many Christians know what this is? Instead we have a Biblically illiterate society, I have witnessed this everywhere I go to speak or worship. It's not because churches are not providing classes and programs, for I think it's being provided, it's just that we do not have disciplers or mentors (whatever you want to call them) taking the time to walk alongside a new follower until he or she gets it. We cannot pass go and collect $25 here, this part is critical.

Jesus taught the Seed Principle found in the Gospels (Matthew 13/Luke 8) when He told the story about 4 kinds of seeds. Only 1 in 4 produced fruit. I don't know about you but that is a horrible statistic!! I am going to begin praying and fasting for a transformational movement where all we do is help people "get it" before we ask them to go public about it, where we really walk alongside new followers while they fall in love with God, and not the do's and don't of religion and church, but a radical way of seeing God for who He really is, what He has really done and who we are in Him. Who will join me, or lead me to whom can I join to see this into reality? I know it starts with prayer as it must come first and foremost through faith in God. Believe me, God wants this, grieves over it not being here already and wants us who are secure in our faith to pass this onto others! May God ignite a new Christianity here in the States that overflows out of hearts that are fully in love with Him.

60 Years is Quite Amazing!

I am flying out of Florida tomorrow to go back to my hometown in Illinois to gather with all of my siblings, my daughters, son in law, their nephews, nieces, their kids and their grandkids to celebrate something truly amazing. My Dad and Mom married each other 60 years ago this month! That's a long time and worth celebrating!!! As with any kid growing up back then there were things I didn't like, that I suffered through, and things I wished were different about my parents and family. It's taken some years of thinking, writing and talking things out to come to a very good and accepting place about my life! And we didn't even have that much dysfunction! But growing up the 4th of 5, and with the 3 ahead me being high achievers and popular didn't make it easy for me since I was neither particularly smart, athletic or popular! I eventually caught up in many ways, but what I KNEW and could count on was that I always had the love and support of my parents and my family. My folks showed love and verbalized it too. And a part of their legacy is the reality that the 5 of us off-spring all love each other deeply, would do anything for each other and those around us, and that we are pretty close!

We are planning a fun and hopefully memorable celebration, a catered dinner, a photographer, an open house, some gifts and speeches! All of this to honor them and they deserve it!!! They have seen a lot happen in history since 1950, they raised 5 kids without microwaves and a dishwasher, we had one car for many years, one tv without a remote control, we shared rooms. There were Dr. and Dentist visits they probably could not afford, Christmas and birthday presents that made any luxuries impossible, and sacrifice was a regular part of their lives. Most of our vacations were spent visiting relatives or camping,and we didn't mind at all. I can't imagine what it was like paying for school supplies and clothes at the beginning of each school year! My Dad worked a factory job even though he truly wanted to be a history teacher, and my Mom worked mostly as a Florist. I can't imagine they had much money left over after a trip to the grocery store, but we never lacked for anything. They loved on as best they knew how, made sure we were honest and respectful and didn't swear, or we would get our mouth's washed out with Ivory soap. They came to our sporting events (well Mom didn't, she couldn't stand watching). They even put a couple of us through college even though they never went.

In just a few words - they were rock steady and always could be counted on. They remained faithful to each other even though they are two very different people. As we gather this weekend there will be 4 generations of Conklin's and a long and wonderful legacy passed on! Here's to you Don and Dorothy Conklin, congratulations on 60 years of marriage, that is quite amazing and so are you Dad and Mom!

Welcome to the Family

This past weekend my oldest daughter Brittany married Thomas Rivera up in N.E. Georgia. Of course a family wedding can be a pretty big deal, but when you are the Father of the Bride, well, it was my first! I need to admit something from the get go, I screwed up quite a bit these last 4 years while they dated. I am not saying it was all my fault, but I need to take responsibility for my actions/lack of them. I am a Father that has been pretty protective of my girls and I have prayed for my daughter's spouses since the day they were born. I prayed that their husbands would love God first and foremost, my daughters next and then take great care of them by providing for them and bringing out the best in them! I messed up because I made it nearly impossible for Thomas to reach the standards I had in my head and heart. I became a very judgmental and self-righteous person, and it spilled out in other area's of my life.

Fortunately, God and some special people in my life who have a lot of wisdom and were willing to speak the truth in love to me, helped redeem the situation. Thanks to Karyn, my Mom, Tim Popadic and Dick Walker!!! And thank you Holy Spirit for convicting me gently, and for author John Piper's writings which help steer me in the right direction. I have much to learn and a long way to go on this journey that's for sure! All that to say that in that final hour I call 11:59:59, I was able to sit with Brittany and Thomas and confess sin, seek forgiveness, walk in repentance and start fresh! Thank you Britt and Thomas for grace and forgiveness. I always wanted a son and now I have a son-in-law whom I want to get to know a lot better and do fun, masculine and spiritual things together.


I write this to express to you that no matter what you've done or not done, or what's been done to you, it's never to late for redeeming it all!! Hope is a powerful thing and I want to give you some if I can. I didn't see a way out of my mess up and knew I had pushed my daughter and Thomas away by my self-righteous behavior. But, thankfully through a teachable spirit and an incredible God, the best outcome prevailed. If there is a relationship in your life that needs healing and reconciliation, or a wrong that needs righting, or some sin that needs confessing, I just want you to know that it's never too late! God wants us to live in peace and harmony, with love and grace lavished all over each other. Swallow your pride (not easy to admit or do) and make the move toward everything God wants for you (wherever possible make your amends). The results of this are incredible!!! They lighten your load, bring freedom and allow you to have hope for a great present and future.

My family drove 2,000 miles roundtrip over the weekend to be together for this joyous occasion and we all had the time of our lives! What was also amazing was how much easier my family accepted and loved on Thomas than I ever did previously. Thomas, welcome to the family!!!